Howes suggests you make another kind of lists to boost your confidence and appreciate how far you’ve come. Don’t force to write everything at a single sitting. Sometimes, the people close to us are better at noticing our greatest strengths. Start with something basic like “I’m a kind person.” If you are having trouble coming up with things you are great at, ask your friends and colleagues to help you. You can even go a step further by writing your abilities down. Pay more attention to things you are good at. If you are having a tough time accepting yourself, hone your strengths. Learning self-acceptance teaches you to focus your mind to provide self-pardon, rather than repeating fear-provoking habits self-judgment. See it as a skill you can practice versus an innate trait you either have or don’t. Life with self-acceptance is far better than a life of self-hatred.įortunately, self-acceptance is something we can nurture. Self-loathing or poor self-acceptance doesn’t lead to a satisfying life. “It is vital that we set an intention for ourselves that we are willing to shift paradigms from a world of blame, doubt and shame to a world of allowance, tolerance, acceptance, and trust,” he said. Self-acceptance begins with intention,” according to psychotherapist Jeffrey Sumber, MA. Practicing self-acceptance requires that you develop more self-compassion Getting through life happily requires us to understand the balance of positive and negative emotions and work towards accepting ourselves and still become the best versions of ourselves. This can easily become a cycle that becomes difficult to break. We are much better collectors of our shortcomings than our strengths,” according to Ryan Howes, Ph.D., a psychologist in Pasadena, California. That means they spend more time contemplating the bad stuff and less time on the good stuff. People who judge themselves harshly process negative emotions more than negative ones. Typical human behavior focuses on negative qualities. Nass - a professor of communications at Stanford University - explains, “Negative emotions generally require more thinking, and the information is processed more thoroughly than positive ones.” You can accept them and still focus on being the best version of yourself. The good news is, we don’t have to identify with these emotional feelings. The bitter is, we will never be free of the feelings of despair, or self-loathing. And more negative thoughts can quickly become your reality. And with more doubt comes even more negative thoughts about themselves. If you are oblivious to what others think about you, and you don’t judge yourself in many situations in life, then self-acceptance is probably irrelevant.īut for many people, self-acceptance is a daily struggle. In other words, you enjoy as much happiness as you believe you’re worthy of [emphasis added.” The more self-acceptance you have, the more happiness you’ll allow yourself to accept, receive and enjoy. In fact, your level of self-acceptance determines your level of happiness. Self-acceptance could be the key to a happier life, yet it’s the happy habit many people practice the least.Īs Robert Holden puts it in his book Happiness Now! “Happiness and self-acceptance go hand in hand. When we’re self-accepting, we’re able to embrace all facets of ourselves - not just the positive parts. Self-acceptance is the feeling of satisfaction with yourself despite your weaknesses and regardless of your past behaviors and choices. It frees you from an overly high concern with what other people think about you. Self-acceptance is the ability to accept yourself as you are instead of how you wish you were, or how you wish others percieved you. Tara Brach, author of Radical Self Acceptance, the feelings of shame and unworthiness are the source of many problems we experience with our relationships, careers, and creative endeavors. If you finally accept yourself and your vulnerabilities, your life will be much more liberating.Īccording to Dr. Mark Twain once said, “The worst loneliness is to not be comfortable with yourself.” He couldn’t be more right.
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